Saturday, 17 February 2007

why blog????

Blogging is supposed to be fun. It is supposed to be stress free, it is supposed to allow me to write and express my thoughts and opinions without harsh critisicm or judgement.
Lately I have not felt that blogging is any of these things. After some ridicule on a post I did regarding personality and underwear choice was bashed by someone She wrote the following on a board accesable by all the mothers in my online group "HI, I’m new to the group and have some concerns. I looked at the website and looked at some links of members and found a very disturbing posting.
“When I meet someone new I always kind of wonder (not in a perverted way) what kind of undies they like to wear. I try to figure out based on their personality and persona if they are cotton brief wearers, thong or tanga enthusiasts…sometimes I even get a peak at their undies when they bend over to pick something up -which are most often sticking out from the top of their lower than their underwear pants “ "I have two little girls and do not think a mommy should use a baby group as a place to fulfill her weird fetish. I find it strange a mommy would even post such a thought knowing her website is linked to this site. I think I would be very uncomfortable now around this mom wondering if she is looking at me or even my girls. Maybe this mom needs some help? I just think as a mother I should make other moms aware of the thoughts this mother has. It was under gaviesgal or something like that (a blog) I’m just very carefull having two young daughters with a world full of crazy people (male & female)"
I tried to blow these ridiculous comments off but I cannot stop thinking about how this mother misread my innocent, attempt at a funny post as something dirty and deviant. There was absolutely nothing there intended to make anyone uncomfortable or believe that I could possibly do harm to another woman or a child. This comment has been weighing on my mind since I initially read it a couple of days ago. I have never met the woman who wrote this in person and really do not care to meet her EVER.
There have been other posts in the past that were misconstrued as well. I won't get into all the details now but I just want to make the point that sometimes email and the written word is not taken in the context it is written. People may read between the lines-and incorrectly at that, or the writer does not express what they are trying to say with enough poise and eloquence that they are misunderstood. I suppose this is why we spend years taking English classes analysing writings of all sorts!
Before you respond to my query please note that most of my "mommy friends" came to my defence and did in fact stand up for me, stating that this comment was ludicrous and absolutely unfounded but it has still be on my mind and I would love other views on what this one mother read into my post (which i deleted because I was so upset by these accustions)
Thanks everyone!!


7 comments:

  1. Anonymous4:07 pm

    Wow, that is crazy!!! What kind of prude thinks that someone that likes to, jokingly, discuss panty styles with other women, has some kind of fetish?? Has she not noticed that women's magazines are full of articles aobut lingerie? That is because women like lingerie!!

    I think she is a freak not you! I was wondering why that post disappeared...

    Oh well, I certainly am not worried about that fact that my daughter will be in your home tonight!! (horrors, we better keep a close eye on her-if I catch you checking out her Barbie briefs you'll be in big trouble! LOL)

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  2. Anonymous4:43 pm

    Oh my gosh! That is just ridiculous! I don't think you should worry about someone like that. She's just looking for something to complain about. Some people are just like that.

    It's too bad you felt you had to take that post off. This is YOUR blog- your place to vent, express, and say how you feel. Your comment and curiosity about people's panties was innocent. Hey, we all wonder about things. Like, I sometimes wonder how a couple interacts inside the home and when they're not in the public. Do they really get along as well as it appears on the outside? That's just one of the weird things I think about. It's harmless. It's just curiosity.

    Anyway, SHE's the sicko for twisting things around and MAKING it perverse.

    I've lived with you for two years and I know you're a well-adjusted person and a wonderful friend, wife and mom.

    ReplyDelete
  3. hey Dina,
    Don't think about it anymore that woman was an idiot especially posting those comments on our mommy board and not trying to talk to you first. I hope you don't let it bring you down. I wish I could have read the blog as I would love to see how this woman could misread your comments to be deviant. I know all of us girls have thought about some cute guy in front of us and checking out his bum and yes sometimes I have thought about boxers or briefs.
    I hope this woman does not show up to anything and have a feeling she won't as so many people jumped to your defence.
    Hope that you can laugh at this one day as this woman has a few screws loose.

    ReplyDelete
  4. thanks everyone!! I won't think about this anymore- i am trying to laugh about it...besides i have other things to think about- like how am i ever going to get all these loads of underwear washed!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous1:37 am

    Hi Dina,

    I've only met you a couple of times, and there no way whatsoever do I feel threaten or uncomfortable with you. I hope you'll forget all the comments that were made. I think it's admirable of you to write what's on you mind and should continue to do so. I've read a few of your adventures, ie getting your brows waxed, and I can totally relate; and it's nice to know I'm not the only one who got excited about getting my eyebrows waxed.

    ReplyDelete
  6. helen- thanks!! i get excited over very basic things these days- like waxing, or having a few extra minutes in the morning to sleep late (well 8 am is now late)
    amazing how our whole outlook changes when we become mothers!!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think your candor and wit is refreshing and I love your blog! As I said in my e:mail to the group I didn't feel her reaction or her actions were appropriate, especially as she hadn't even met you or anyone else in the group, for that matter. She really twisted it ... when I read the parts she "lifted" I found it funny and like you said, the female equivalent of the boxers/briefs argument.

    And seriously, what's wrong with a fetish anyway ;) LOL!

    ReplyDelete

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